The Awkwardness of Get Togethers….

I wasn’t going to write this because I am sure that the people who aren’t attending SNAP are all rolling their eyes and thinking “Great. Just what I need another post about SNAP.” But then I realized that what I am about to type doesn’t only count for this weekend but for all the time with everyone.

This past weekend, I was chit chatting with a blogger who is just starting off and getting involved with get-togethers and parties and conferences and such. She told me about an experience she had a little bit ago where she meet up with some other bloggers but was totally blown off because of the size of her blog – basically she was a nobody. She is headed to SNAP this weekend and is worried about being “social” because of her experience.

As she relayed her experience to me, I felt awful for her. I couldn’t believe that other creative bloggers would treat her like that – but then I could – I have seen it myself and have fallen victim to it before. It sucks to stand there as the odd man out and feel like a big loser.

I sort of feel like there is a little bit of a “high school” stamina a little bit in blogging. Ya know what I mean.

But then when you think about high school, you can probably pick out a few people that were friends with EVERYONE. It didn’t matter who they were or if they were cool or nerdy – they just got along with everyone.

I want to be that person. The easy going girl that everyone can approach because I’m not going to make you feel dumb. So if you see me this weekend at SNAP (or anywhere else) – please, please come and say hello to me!

Last summer my sister called me and told me that one of her co-workers and friends had seen me a a city fair but didn’t come up to me to say hello because she felt dumb. Sad. I really wish she would have. I would have loved to meet her!

I know that I am just a little tiny blog (by comparison) but one of my favorite things about blogging are meeting and making new friends. Some of my best friends right now are fellow bloggers who I love and adore! But we never would have met each other if one us didn’t say “hello!”

Now the really honest part – I am so stinkin’ shy – it almost kills me and I wish I could just be loud and fun – but really – that doesn’t happen until I know you (and then you probably wish I was still shy because I will just yak your ear off!) So if I see you and walk by and smile – it’s because I am big time loser and am totally intimidated by you!

There are so many amazing ladies out there with way more talent than I and it is so easy to feel inferior. This is something that I am working on. Confidence.

Did you notice that above I asked you to come up to me and say hello? Because I am big huge chicken. and I have been denied before. and made to feel like a loser so I lost some confidence. But that is something that I am working on. Are you like me? I know there are a bunch of us out there!! I will not make you feel like that! Let’s try and toss our cowardly ways out the windows and be friends!!

So if you all of a sudden see some awkward girl standing by you working up the courage to say hello – never fear – it is just me and I am a nice girl. I promise!



Anonymous said...

I am so glad you posted about this! I tend to be shy in group situations too :) but I want so bad to be that girl that is friends with everyone! I'll make sure and find you at SNAP, then we can be shy together ;) cyndimarie.com

Kaysi @ Keeping it Simple said...

I am exactly the same way as you!! I'm get super shy. I needed you at the last meetup for the creative guild. I felt so comfortable talking to you even though we hadn't even met! Good luck with SNAP, hopefully you can get your confidence and get yourself out there. If I don't see you on Saturday, I'll definitely see you at the race :)

Unknown said...

Here's the thing-I'm a naturally shy person BUT my parents raised us to always be welcoming to other people and to put ourselves out there. So while inside I'll be scared/embarrassed/terrified on the outside I have this way of covering it all up until it gets to be too much. And then I just kind of break down into my true shy self. I just hope I don't come off as fake (it's been known to happen) because I'm trying to hard to impress. Anyways-I am really excited about SNAP and all the things I'll learn. I'm super nervous about meeting people (since I am still a really small blog) but I think it'll be an amazing experience no matter what :)

See you there!

Newlyweds on a Budget

Carolyn said...

I have met the most amazing and interesting people by walking up and saying hi. I even had a job of socializing at admissions events with prospective students in college.
Don't be shy because you never know who you will meet. Have fun at SNAP!

Unknown said...

I can totally relate to this post. I too, reached out to some "BIG" named blogs (with loads of hits per day) and was denied any kind of contact what so ever. Really is it that hard to just say hello and respond to my email. I dont run my blog to make money but for the community of blog friends and moms that I have connected to. This is way more important to me then "hits". So I feel your pain about other Bloggers.Enjoy your conference. I should really go to one. Let me know how it goes and keep your head high.

Catskill Quilter said...

Fabulous post, Amanda! I cannot imagine a better goal than being the woman who befriends everyone, and makes them feel comfortable! You go, Girl!

Sims Family said...

I'm glad you will be there...I am going alone and feeling a little apprehensive, too. But I remember sitting by you at Creative Estates and chatting. Hopefully it will be just as comfortable there. (Since I'm not in the "cheerleader" group. lol)

Tamarynn Leigh said...

I love you! I love you! I love you!!!!!!! You are so incredibly talented and have such a sweet, sincere heart! Here's looking forward to more times of "yakking" each other's ears off!!!!

Colette said...

Loved your post!! I *ALMOST* registered for SNAP, but ended up talking myself out of it because I felt like I probably wasn't a big enough blogger and wondered who I'd mingle and connect with. Maybe I should set that aside and next time just jump in and go!

My Computer is My Canvas

Melanie@Crafty Cupboard said...

I'm so glad I got to hang out with you last year- I had so much fun! I got blown off at Creative Estates by the only blogger who lives close to me, so I was SUPER sad. Her blog was in the same size range as mine, but she only wanted to talk to the 'big' bloggers. I realized fast that size didn't matter- it was the person behind the name! You were a terrific example to me of being so warm and welcoming!

Robin @ Bird On A Cake said...

I can relate...sometimes blogging does feel a bit like high school (the bad parts)! I wish I was coming to SNAP, but that is a long way from Florida. Maybe next year! I hope you have a fabulous time!! :0)

Bridget said...

You have always been so sweet to me and I was just telling my husband about you. Thanks for not being one of "those" bloggers and taking the time to chat with me. I also feel like popular bloggers feel like if I do talk to them it is just trying to gain something from them but that isn't the case. I have just been a fan of theirs and there is nothing worse then meeting someone you adore to find out they aren't what you thought.


Sharon said...

So, this could be my story too. I have never been to any quilt or crafting retreats or shows or get-togethers. Don't seem to run in those circles but I do love reading all of the creative inspiration on other blogs. I don't have one of my own. Sometimes I still feel intimidated in my LQS cause often I feel that I just don't fit in their either. I love to sew & quilt & craft so will keep at it. IF I was coming to SNAP I sure would come visit you!! Have fun.

Crystal said...

I love this post, Amanda! I'm so bummed about not going to SNAP. You're the first blogger I approached with a question and you were so sweet, I wish I could meet you in person to give you a hug and say Thank You!! When buying SNAP tickets was going on I didn't really "know" any bloggers that I could room with or even hang out with so I didn't get one. Maybe someday I'll get to meet you and I'll get the courage to approach you first! :)

marissa | Rae Gun Ramblings said...

this is great, super encouraging. I'll be swinging by the market and hopefully I'll see you so I can say hi and get the guts up to say hi to all the other fun ladies that will be around


amy smart said...

Amanda, I LOVED this post. You echoed so many of my own thoughts. Even this morning I was still feeling a little dweeby about going to S. Just reading your post made me feel so much better. I'm excited to see you!

Unknown said...

I think that's great for you to bring attention to this. I, too, am a very small, almost non-existent, blog but would love to attend some of these conferences to learn and to hear advice from the biggies. I often say I'm gonna go to the next one, but then I chicken out!

Maureen Hayes said...

Good for you for posting about this. As women, as bloggers, as creative types, as moms, whatever our roles in life- we should be building one another up, not tearing each other down! You have always been welcoming and kind to me (as have most "crafty" bloggers), but there are people who don't answer questions or ever respond to comments or make you feel "less" because you don't blog, or your blog isn't as big as theirs, etc. so sad, because you know what? They are missing out on knowing some great people. Their loss! Have a wonderful time at SNAP, and I have a feeling you will be very popular! As for being shy, it is just part of who you are, just as I am naturally outgoing. It makes the world more interesting that we all have different personalities. I like who I am, but I would be bored with a world of people exactly like me!

Thanks for writing this, it obviously touched a nerve with a lot us. You were very courageous to address it.

Unknown said...

I really loved this post! I am also pretty shy when it comes to meeting new people. I'm slowly getting better. My husband in the military so we move alot. I force myself out there to meet other ladies. I have met so many wonderful friends now from all over:) But it is always something I will always continue to work on.

Lolly Jane said...

Great post, Amanda! I hope you are enjoying SNAP- it takes a lot to put yourself out there, for sure. I'm sure you're having a blast and hopefully are making some new blogging friends!

If you see Kelli, give her a squeeze from me... she was hesitant to go solo, too ;)

XO- Kristi

Unknown said...

Yeah, I kind of WAS rolling my eyes about SNAP posts - way to make a giant portion of the craft blogging world feel like the odd man out, right?
But your post WAS different, and I just wanted to say, I totally feel you about the whole "crafty blogging being like high school" thing. I've thought that since just after I started blogging 2 and 1/2 years ago.
Anyway, if I ever see you out and about I'll say hi! (but I live in Wisco, so it isn't really likely, huh?) ;)

Jen @ tatertotsandjello.com said...

I loved your post Amanda. I am super shy too. It's hard to put myself out there and I think maybe people think I might be aloof or something when I am actually terrified. I think you are darling.



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